Blue Macabre Page 20
Shortly after he’d felt Karin’s conception, he’d found a calendar and counted off months, weeks, and days. He selected a specific number on the following year and circled the date in red, well before the doctor handed down his own verdict of due date. His calculating mind had created a new file, and from that point on he categorized every aspect of their daily routine and made certain all parts combined for the benefit of the whole. Not a single minute passed he did not visualize the baby, in his mind’s eye a handsome, blonde and blue-eyed son. His dreams of Donna were relegated to a closed file in his mind, but the child of the dreams became completely real and vivid.
The receptionist was delighted to see him again. He stood at the desk and checked in as Karin seated herself comfortably and picked up a magazine. The woman behind the counter smiled, her glasses once again rising above her brow. “Good morning, Mr. Rawlins, it’s good to see you again! I see your friend is back?” She glanced at her computer. “Prenatal – well congratulations!”
Mr. Universe smiled knowingly. “Now how did you know who I was?”
She giggled. “You’re not easy to forget,” she said with a sly smile. “You just have a seat, and they’ll call you in shortly.” She jotted a name on the sign-in log.
He sat beside Karin, feeling satisfied and proud and took her hand in his. They’d finally mastered her morning sickness and he knew she didn’t even think twice about being near the restroom. She was much happier and healthier than the first time they’d come in. She let her magazine fall to her lap and turned to him, face beaming, eyes glossy. “Did you sign me in?”
“Yes. Now – you have all your questions ready that you want to ask?”
She looked at him blankly, and he supported her thinking with a mental nudge. “Oh yes! I know everything that I’m supposed to say!” He patted her leg as the nurse announced her name.
Dr. Simmons gave her a thorough pelvic exam. She seemed very healthy, and everything checked out fine. After, he sat on a stool and reviewed her computerized chart. She sat on the exam table with a sheet across her legs. She shifted on the table and the gown she was wearing open to the front separated, exposing a view of her breasts and belly. The doctor glanced at her; she was looking at a colorful print hanging on the wall, oblivious to her nudity. He paused a few seconds but she never moved. He got up and gently pulled the fabric together; she turned her face to his and smiled without acknowledgement. He stared at her, confusion on his own face, and sat back down. “Well Karin, I must say you’ve come a long way with this since the last time you were here. You seem to be feeling fine.”
She smiled at him, and when she spoke her voice was soft and child-like. “Yes, Dr. Simmons. I do feel much better.”
He stood and faced her, looking closely. The pupils of her eyes were a bit dilated, and he gently pulled the lower lids down, examining. “You aren’t taking any other medications – even over the counter – besides what I prescribed, are you?”
“Oh no,” she said cheerfully. “Chris is taking very good care of me. He fixes all my meals and sees to it I get plenty of rest.”
Dr. Simmons raised his eyebrows and glanced at the face of his attending nurse, whose expression was also puzzled. Karin failed to notice either of them and continued to admire the colorful print. “Well,” he said as he fiddled with a small circular chart that had several overlapping dials, “I’ve calculated your due date. “January 15th.”
Karin turned her face to him and calmly said, “That’s wonderful. I can’t wait to tell Chris.” Her hands remained relaxed and folded in her lap. The doctor motioned his nurse out of the room and joined her in the corridor. He said into her ear, “Something strange about her? Or is it just me?”
She nodded. “Kind of like she’s been rehearsing or something, I don’t know.” They looked at each other for a moment as he went back into the room.
Dr. Simmons sat back down on the stool, and chewed thoughtfully on the end of his pen. He bit down on it as he watched Karin. Leaning toward her he said, “Karin, may I ask you a personal question?” She looked at him blankly. “Do you know who the father of your baby is?”
She blinked her eyes several times, rapidly. When she spoke, the tone of her voice was slightly different, assuming another timbre. “Why, Doctor. Rest assured the baby’s father is well aware.”
She grinned a crooked little half-smile.
He welcomed her with open arms as she came out. “Well what did he say?”
“January 15th.” He kissed her forehead. They walked hand in hand to the front desk, where he made a series of appointments for the next few months. The receptionist developed an aura of envy as she watched Karin, amusing Chris. The woman said to her, “You look like you’re feeling much better.”
Karin did not respond, and he prompted her with an unspoken thought. “Thank you,” she replied vacantly, “I do feel much better.”
He scribbled the date, amount, and his signature on a check. “Here’s a thousand. The next time we’re in I’ll make another payment.” The receptionist’s envious feelings were now intertwined with her desire to know more about his financial status. “Thank you. And – here’s your prescription for the prenatal vitamins. We’ll see you next month!” She followed them out the door with her eyes.
He helped her into her car and got in behind the wheel. “Well, what wonderful news. A little miracle on the fifteenth of January.” He looked out the window at an overdue baby still in its mother’s belly, both of them walking into the clinic. He squinted through the bright sunshine. “What do you say we go to the mall and have lunch at that nice seafood place? We could also pick up some things for the baby.” His blue eyes sparkled.
Her face mirrored his. Her blue eyes shone as well, but not vibrantly – an empty reflection. “That sounds great.” She frowned and looked down at her lap.
“Nausea? Not feeling good?” She raised her eyebrows, squinting at him. “Did you forget to take your medicine this morning?” He reached over and placed a palm on her abdomen, gazing through the windshield at a young couple exiting the clinic, toting an infant in a carrier. “There now. That’s better, isn’t it?” He helped fasten her seatbelt and started the car. He rolled the window of the compact down and the car filled with refreshing breeze.
Parking near one of the main entrances, he got out and helped her from her seat. She held his hand as he led her inside and a short distance down the main corridor to the restaurant.
They were seated at a table for two, a cozy nook. He ordered for them both one of the house specialties, salmon quiche. They were first served a marvelous green salad and fresh bread; he sliced the bread and put real butter on a warm slice for her, smiling as he knew she found it yummy. When the quiche was served she balked as it was unfamiliar – but he made her watch him eat his first bite and savor it. Anxious to please, she followed his lead. “There you go, it’s good, isn’t it?” She smiled and swallowed.
He ate, she ate. They smiled a lot.
In a good mood, he favored the server with a generous tip.
They strolled the shops of the mall, window shopping and hanging on each other. They comprised a striking pair, she with her pretty face and femininity, he with his masculinity and command. She babbled meaningless conversation now and then, pointing out to him this outfit or that pair of shoes. As they came to a drug and variety store, he asked “Didn’t Dr. Simmons give you a prescription for vitamins?”
Her face was a total blank. He mentally prodded her and she said “Yes. I have something in my pocket.” She fumbled in her jeans and withdrew a slip of paper, handing it to him. She looked up at the name of the store boldly displayed above their heads. “So you think we can get them here?” He steered her toward Pharmacy.
Near the end of the mall was a wonderful children’s shop, delights for both parents and kids, its prices half practical, half frivolous. Karin followed Chris as he led her by the hand. There were brightly colored clothes for even the tiniest child, huggable stuffed a
nimals, frothy dresses, airplanes and trains. Karin’s eyes shone as she wandered between shelves and racks, caressing items with her fingertips. She repeated her earlier actions, pointing out this and that, finding something newer and more enticing around every additional display. He grinned his peculiar smile and allowed her to browse, perusing the shelves himself as he kept an eye on her.
His attention was drawn to a shelf displaying an exquisite baby blanket. Pure white, its only adornment was the artistic weave of its fabric. He picked it up and fondled it, captivated by its softness and warmth. He held it to his face and shut his eyes, and as he breathed in its scent he saw his child wrapped in its caress. He held it tenderly as he looked up and around for Karin, spotting her in the midst of a stuffed zoo, squeezing a large furry bear as she carried on a conversation with it. He rescued the bear and put his arm around her. “Find one you like?”
Her eyes were glassy. “Oh yes, please. Could we get it?”
“Sure.” He steered her to the cashier, and as he pulled out his wallet he mentioned, “I found this blanket, and thought it was rather special. Do you like it too?”
She took it from him and held it to her cheek. “Yes, Daddy,” she said softly.
Chapter Twenty-One
The weekend of the fourth of July was sunny and hot. Early that Saturday, Chris yawned and stretched as he lay in bed. Karin stirred beneath the sheet exposing her arm, shoulder, and breast. A fan stirred the warm air in the room from its perch on the windowsill. He got out of bed and stretched again, then opened the door and went down the hall. The cat was waiting as usual. When he opened the door she dashed into the room and jumped up on the bed, curling against Karin’s legs.
He wandered into the kitchen and opened the back door, disappointed when he didn’t feel any air movement. His skin felt sticky and sweaty. He went into the great room and opened the door to the deck, rewarded with a gentle breeze. He shifted the elastic on his boxers and headed for the coffee maker.
Back in his room, he pulled on a tank top and cotton shorts. In the kitchen he pulled the carafe from the brewer and poured himself a cup. He replaced the carafe and set his cup down, rubbing his face and eyes.
Pausing beside the spot where he stashed bills and pending papers in Jenny’s tradition, he picked up the small stack and sat down at the table with them. He looked at each, sorting them into categories. He got up and retrieved his checkbook, scribbled dates and amounts, and inserted each check and remittance into its envelope. Most were insignificant as he’d paid off all his credit cards and bills from Atlanta, and much of Jenny’s as well – she’d been so appreciative and so willing to let him take charge of everything on that end. He was also paying in advance for the upcoming birth. He enjoyed a very positive cash flow, being well tendered from the partnership buyout. Only one bill made him give pause, a premium notice for homeowners insurance on the lake house. He saved it for last.
too fucking far from a fire station
About the time he was contemplating a dip in the lake, the phone rang and he snatched it up before it woke Karin. “Hello?”
“Good morning, Chris. It’s Suanne.”
“Morning! How are my two favorite ladies getting along?”
“We’re fine, getting really used to the motherhood role. Rachel’s growing so fast – I need to bring her up to see you and Jen and Andy before she’s twenty-one.”
His mind clicked and sorted. “Don’t be silly. Life just gets in the way at times. Talked to Jen lately?”
“No, actually it’s been a few weeks since we spoke and I’m still playing catch-up with my practice here. A long time away creates even more problems than you had before. Have you seen them lately?”
A twinge of remorse zinged his lie, but it was easily quashed. “Yeah, saw them not too long ago. They came over for just the weekend to check on things. They both looked great – married life seems to be agreeing with them. I think Andy might have put on a few pounds.”
That can be a side effect of being happy at home, or so I’ve heard. Me, it’s a permanent problem whether I’m single or whatever. Still fighting pounds I put on with Rachel.”
“I’m sure you’ll be back in shape in no time,” he said as he sipped coffee.
“I’m sorry to say, but I seem to have somehow lost their new number in Yakima. Can you give it to me again?”
“No problem.” He checked the list by the phone and rattled it off to her. “Good to hear from you – maybe I’ll cruise down to Portland one weekend and take you out to dinner.” He noticed a slight pause before she spoke, her voice the tiniest bit quieter.
“Any time, just be sure to call first, okay?”
He scowled as he hung up the phone.
Karin finished the lunch he’d prepared, and watched as he cleaned the kitchen. He commented, “Looks like the sun is perfect this afternoon.” She continued watching, her face expressionless. “Why don’t we lay out?” He dried his hands. “Never can get too much vitamin C and D for the baby.” He went to her and stood behind, massaging her neck. “Okay?” He bent to look at her face.
Her blue eyes were vacant, her mouth twisted into a crooked half-grin. “Whatever you want is fine with me.” She clasped his hand, holding it against her cheek.
They spent most of the afternoon outside on the deck, both of them wearing matching thongs, she with a scanty bra. He’d purchased them online and they’d begun wearing them as soon as the weather had permitted. Their bodies were bronzed. He drizzled the last of the tanning oil over her belly, and she wriggled on her towel but didn’t laugh. “Tickles.” As he rubbed the liquid on her skin she sighed. “I think I’ll be sorry to see fall come, and summer leave. Summer used to be my favorite season . . . maybe.”
“Well this year there is something much more exciting to look forward to.” He smiled knowingly as she looked at him vacantly.
“What?” she asked. He slapped her leg, gently. “Ow!”
“The baby, of course, what else?” He stood and towered over her. She looked up at him for approval, shielding her eyes from the sun with her hand. He pivoted on his heel and ran, jumping off the end of the deck and cannonballing into the lake, drenching her with the splash.
“HEY!” The corners of her mouth turned into a childish pout.
He laughed as he reached up and grabbed her ankles. “Come and get more wet.” She slid into the water beside him.
He held her in his arms, the water chest deep, shielded from view. He held her gaze and then kissed her as he slipped the thong from her hips, laying it along with his own on the deck.
Next weekend, the late July evening was pleasant and cool. They sat on the deck in a couple of padded lounge chairs, he with a cold beer and she with a tall glass of orange juice. As the phone rang he was grateful it was within reach.
“Hello.”
“Hey there, my brother, what’cha doing?” Jenny’s voice sounded sweet and happy.
“Not much, just sitting out on the deck enjoying the evening. What’s up with you?”
“Life just keeps getting better and better.” She laughed across the distance, and for a moment his smile was genuine. “Andy’s fine, and believe it or not, we have almost the same schedule these days. He’s been able to pull mostly day shifts, and with my hours at the real estate office it works out great. Everything good there?”
“Perfect, actually. Not too hot here today. The lake has been so warm!”
“I know, it must be just about the perfect temperature. That is one thing I DO miss. And Karin? She’s okay? And Rebecca?”
both pussies are fine
“They’re both cool, literally. Rebecca has nested under those big Rhodies in the front yard. Karin’s at work, evening shift tonight. All is well.” His heartbeat quickened as he picked up something else through the wire.
“Well, I do have some good news for you – Andy and I got some help through the office I work in and we’ve bought a condo!” Her enthusiasm flooded the phone line. “It’s gre
at – a nice two bedroom, two bath in a wonderful location, a community with lots of amenities.”
As he listened, a wave of nausea crested her flood. He feigned something cheerful for her behalf. “That’s great, Jen! I’m happy for you.”
“There’s one other thing, though –“
what thing
“We’ve decided we like it here so much, we want to stay permanently. We’re going to put Andy’s house on the market right away, and I’m still thinking about what to do with my house.”
He felt as though the breath he’d been holding was sucked into a black hole. Thoughts rocketed through his brain. The threat to his well-executed plan for the baby was unthinkable. He needed more time. “Don’t you think that’s rushing into things a bit? I mean, until you’ve been there a little longer?”